Thursday, August 31, 2006

I know these are a bit old, but they still made me snigger:

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.


AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other
to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when
the cow drops dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows. You go on strike because you want
three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows. You redesign them so they are
one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce
twenty times the milk.
You then create clever cow cartoon images called
Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live
for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows. Both are mad.


AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You break for lunch. Life is good.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You count them and learn you have
five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42
cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
You stop counting cows and open another bottle of
vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You
charge others for storing them.

A HINDU CORPORATION
You have two cows. You worship them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them.
You arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.

A WELSH CORPORATION
You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.

I hope this irony was deliberate:
I saw a leaflet advertising river "sightseeing" tours (NB SIGHTSEEING). They cost a mere £9, but, generously, (and I quote) "blind customers go free!" I wonder if sightseeing tours get much custom from visually impaired tourists?

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Pass, but I went on the London eye with my uncle, who's VI. He wanted to go.

12:10 pm  
Blogger RLS said...

The London Eye is great!
I just felt it was a vain attempt by London tourism to look generous: "ooh, we'll give free trips to...er...er...blind people!"

Take care
Px

8:09 pm  

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