Rock Hallelujah

For once I am proud of this great nation. Not because of its football prowess. Not even anything to do witht he cricket. And certainly not because of our impressive achievements in the field of international diplomacy. No, I am proud of us for voting for Lithuania in last night's televote for the Eurovision Song Contest. That nation produced the greatest entry I have seen since Guildo and his Orthopaedic Stockings climbed up the scaffolding some time in the late '90s, producing these fine lyrics, set to pretty much the tune kids used when singing "I know something you don't know". Add to this a few middle aged blokes in suits and glasses who looked they were dancing to the karaoke at the works Christmas party and an imposter who looked a bit like Harry Hill's older brother doing a bit of impro in the middle, and you have what I think Eurovision should be all about. Balls to all the women in short skirts and knee-high boots giving their best impressions of Celine Dion and Bonnie Tyler - we want old blokes.

And monsters.

The winning entry was about the only one (well, maybe except Denmark, who actually had quite a good tune and,on account of this and not bordering lots of countries was beaten to almost bottom place) that gave Lithuania any kind of run for their money on the basis of being a bit random AND having costumes. Finland's Lordi looked like a cross between Roy Wood and extras from the Lord of the Rings, and won by miles.

Surprisingly, Britain got a handful of points, too, perhaps on account of not having invaded anyone so far this year.